Batman VS Two-Face Dark Knight Spoof
by madisonhagan1
Summary: Batman VS Two-Face Dark Knight Spoof by collegehumor you can check them out on youtube, they are hilarious. I thought I would share this with you.


Jim Gordon: Harvey put the gun down...You're not going to hurt my family.

Two-Face: No...Just the person you love most.

Two-Face aims the gun at Jim's wife.

Two-Face: So, who is it?

Jim Gordon: J-Just put the gun down, please...

Two-Face moves the gun down, aiming at Jim's son.

Jim Gordon: Damn it! Stop pointing that gun at my family, Dent!

Two-Face: We have a winner...

Two-Face takes the son out of his mother's arms, threatening to pull the trigger.

The mother starts to scream.

Mom: No!

Batman appears out of the shadows.

Batman: You don't want to hurt the boy, Two-Face.

Two-Face: It's not about what I want, It's about what's fair.

Two-Face turns to Jim, his bad side conceiled from Batman's view.

Two-Face: See, you thought we could be decent men.

Batman interupted.

Batman: Harvey! Thank god you're here! Two-face took Gordon's boy hostage.

Everybody stops and looks at Batman confused.

Two-Face turns to Batman, both sides of his face visable.

Batman: Two-Face! You're back!

Two-Face: What are you talking about?

Batman: Give up the boy! Nothing fair ever came out of a barrel of a gun.

Two-Face turnes back towards Jim, again the bad side of his face is conceiled.

Two-Face: He does know what happened to me, right?

Batman interupts.

Batman: Harvey! Now you're back! Use that gun next time Two-face shows his faces.

Two-Face turns back to Batman, both sides of his face again comepletely visable.

Two-Face: Is this because you can only see on side of my face, when i'm talking to him.

Two-Face points at Gordon.

Batman looks around as he freaks out.

Batman: Harvey? Where did you go!? Two-Face is back, and he looks super pissed!

Two-Face: Yeah, because I'm Harvey Dent.

Batman: Nice try Two-Face, but your tricks won't work on me. I'm the world's greatest detective.

Gordon's son: Batman? Harvey Dent is Two-Face.

Batman:...What?

Gordon: B-B-Batman remember when um, you went to save Rachael, but it wasn't Rachael it was Harvey Dent?

Batman:...Huh?

Gordon: And Remeber half of his face-

Gordon points to the left side of his face.

Gordon:-This side of his face. It was covered in gasoline...Stop me when you start remembering all this.

Batman: Oh-Woah woah woah...I want you to know...that I'm comepletely lost...

Two-Face: You really don't remember any of that? Half my face melted and now I'm insane.

Batman: Full disclosure...It's kind of been a crazy day. And uh...This suits really hot. I kinda go in and out.

Two-face looks back at Jim, his bad side concealed again.

Two-Face: T-This is the guy that beat the Joker!?

Gordon: Y-Yeah...I don't know how he did it...

Batman: I-I used my SKILLS I learned in the MOUNTAINS!

Batman pretended to punch people like a child a goofy smile played on his face.

Mom: B-Batman L-listen Harvey Dent is Two-Face They're the same people.

Batman: So Harvey...use to be Two-Face?

Two-Face: I AM! Two-Face! I HAVE TWO FACES! OKAY!? I'm Harvey Dent AND I'm Two-Face. I'm Two-Face and I'm Harvey Dent! Okay! Alright...you know what? Let's start over...

Two-Face turned so that Batman could only see the good side of his face.

Two-Face: Okay...What do you see?

Batman:...Harvey..Face...

Two-Face: Good...

Two-Face turned so Batman could only see his bad side.

Two-Face: Now what do you see?

Batman: Scary-Face...

Two-Face: Okay...Put em' both together and you get?

Batman: Two-Face!

Two-Face: Yes-YES!

Batman: What have you done with Harvey and Scary-Face?! They've done nothing to you...

Two-Face: Okay...Here we go! Right now! Were doin' this! Everybody is gunna get the same chance that Rachael got, 50/50.

Batman: How could we possibly determine that?

Two-Face: By flipping a fucking coin!

Batman: Yeah, Let's just flip a coin, It's head and tails. We need 50 coins and then 50 more...50...50...

Son: Seriously..?

Batman: Then my computer..will analize it...with..SCIENCE!

Two-Face: i'm gunna flip to see if I get to kill you first.

Two-Face flips the coin.

Two-Face: It's heads. Which means I can't kill him. Does anybody here object to a redo?

Everbody shakes their heads, content with the Batman's death.

Gordon: Shoot em'

Batman: Come on!

Two-Face looks down to flip his coin. Batman slammed into him, taking the boy down with him. Batman grabs the boy saving him and himself from falling of the ledge as Two-Face falls to his death. Gordon rushes over to the ledge, looking for his son, but sees Batman. Batman looks down at Two-Face's body, The bad side of his face visable to Batman.

Batman: Guess that's the end of Scary-Face...

Gordon reaches his hand down towards the boy.

Gordon: Give me my son, Dip-Shit.


End file.
